Embedded Music

I know I'm to blame
For everything that 
Went wrong, Everything 
That went right.

I felt your heart beat
And it made my skin 
Sing with ease--nervousness.
Remembering your eyes.

Brown marbles glistening
Beneath your multi-colored
Lights, beaming off the ceiling.
Your messy hair static to the pillow.

Your little black mole
Beneath your right eye.
Your smile so genuine
That dropped me to my knees.

Your laugh making me 
Giggle with happiness.
That's what I remember.
The black and white piano

Singing off your fingers
As I sat behind you,
Memorizing the muscles of 
Your back.

The way you straighten 
Your posture as your body
Moved along with
The beat of the music.

The music embedded into
Your soul and into your heart.
I admired you by the way
You played the piano.

Memorizing the music
As if it were your own.
And I sat behind you
Loving you with my eyes.

An unconditional love 
That teared me up 
With Joy.
Your voice sometimes

Sang along with the music.
Always on key.
Creating this fire in me
To be a better writer.

Now that I don't have 
My muse. Somehow
You inspire me to keep
The words flowing with truth.

Unafraid of what people 
May think or feel.
Understanding how I feel 
In this moment of separation.

Yet, dreaming of you as if
You were still my person.
Buried beneath the blanket
Seeing your face in my mind.

My heart still beats for you. 
Hoping for your return.
Hoping for your apologetic melody.
Hoping for you to come home.

I know I'm to blame for 
Loving you unconditionally.
For letting my guard down.
As you swept the rug from under.

I know how I felt in that moment.
I know how I feel now.
Although, timing or life bumps us
Off course.

My love will always remain.
Even if our paths don't cross again.
Thank you for 7 months of love.
For changing me.

Thank you for a lifetime
Of teases, of misunderstandings
And for loving each other
In the worst of times.

You are and always have been
My muse, my love bug, and my forever.