Scentless Sunrise

-
I've held my breath.
I've looked away.
I've closed my eyes.
I've said goodbye.

 Nothing is worse than
Not knowing how you're doing.
Without seeing your face,
Without hearing your voice.

 I've tried to let go.
I've tried not to think of you.
I've tried to forget your touch.
I've tried to hold on.

 Nothing is worse than
Feeling you against my skin.
As you caress my lips,
While you felt nothing.

 You stared into my face,
And I felt something.
Something magical and right.
But you, however, didn't.

 Nothing is worse than 
Holding your hand.
Knowing that any second,
You're about to let go.

 I've hugged you tight.
I've smelled your cologne
Rub off onto my clothes.
I've loved you.

 Nothing is worse than
Sitting beside you.
Knowing that I won't 
See you again. 

 Do you know how I feel?
Do you even care?
Did you even feel anything?
Did you even want me?

 I've held my breath,
To the sound of your voice.
I've closed my eyes,
To the touch of your skin.

 Nothing is worse than
Loving you more.
More and more each day,
That goes by. 

 I've chosen to move on
Without you.
I've chosen myself 
Above what we had.

 You were nothing more
Than a gem I wanted to keep safe.
You meant more to me
Than you think.

 So, I've closed myself off.
I finally decided, enough.
Never again will I 
Taste the poison from your mouth.

 I've dreamt of you,
Waking up with my head on your chest.
Smelling your cologne,
Rub off into my nose.

 Seeing your smile shine
Against the sunrise through
The blindness windows.
I pulled you tighter.

 Just like my dreams,
The memories will soon fade away.
You'll only be something I had.
Nothing I can hold onto.

 Nothing is worse than
Looking into your face.
And wanting you the same
Way you left me.

 I've walked away,
Even though, I never wanted to.

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