Number Six

-
Enough is enough.
I'm weary of disappointment.
I can only be left so many times,
Before believing I'm the problem.

 And so I am the problem-- 
You left me just like the last.
I wanted more time.
I wanted so much more with you.

 I can say you were like the rest.
To make me feel better.
But, you weren't.
You were different than the last.

 That's why it makes this so much harder.
I didn't want to lose you.
You made me feel seen.
You made me different.

 At first I wasn't all in.
Little by little, you made me invest in you.
You made me believe in you.
Made me even trust you.

 Then slowly, you began to disappear.
I saw it, but I refused to believe it.
I refused to see that you
Were going to be like the others.

 Baby, my heart had been broken
Five times before this.
Most hurt more than others.
You made it to number six.

 You became another listed bullet point.
Yet, I didn't want you to be another
Added number to my list of failures.
I wanted you to last.

 I wanted to hold onto you.
I wanted to breathe you in.
I wanted to be with you.
More than anything, I wanted you to feel the same.

 Enough is enough.
I'm done with hoping for a change.
I can only be left so many times
Before convincing myself I'm the reason.

 Maybe I want too much too soon.
Maybe I go all in before you made it there.
Maybe I'm just pathetic.
Maybe I'm gullible, because I see good.

 Baby, I miss you more and more each day.
Hoping that maybe you will come back.
So I can scratch you off from being 
Number Six.

 You weren't just a number.
You were more to me than just another man.
You were more than another heart break.
You were worthy of my love and affection.

 Somehow, I thought I was going to see you again.
I didn't think February 6th was going to be the last.
Going to the beach, getting sand on our clothes.
Laying down beneath the blanket of stars.

 Digging my face under your chin.
Engraving your scent into my memory.
Holding you tight within my embrace.
Kissing you until we drew breaths of fresh air.

 Baby, you were more than number 6.
And I'll always remember February 6th.

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