Writing from the Heart

I know how I am. How I say things without thinking. How I feel things without warning. How I want things without being lucky. Like I said, I know how I am. For that I'm sorry. For that I'm writing. The only way I can get over this hump. I always want the things I can't have. The things I imagine, When I'm laying on my bed. Right before I close my eyes. I know how I am. How I love without being reciprocated. How I want without getting. How I write, hoping you'd read every word. My heart desires to be loved back. My eyes desire to be gazed into. My ears desire to hear your voice. My hands desire to hold you. I've fallen short. I've hurt you. I've forgave you. I went off on you. For that I'm sorry. I understand you want nothing with me. Your wish is my command. Your silence speaks volumes. Although, the way you stared into my eyes... That can't be acted. Can it? Are you that good? That with every touch, you feel

I can be loyal. I can be free. I can say your name. I can walk away. Dancing beneath the starlight. Nervous breaths taken by the room. Darkness enveloped around our bodies, As we cuddled beside each other.  I can be loyal. I can hold your hand. I can tell you the things you want to hear. I can play the part, just like you. Awakening to the mild sunlight, Messy hair, morning breath,  And the taste of your lips against mine. Waking me until I reacted. I can be loyal. I can be who you want me to be. I can love you. I can hate you. Pulling me tightly within your embrace. As you kiss every inch of my skin. Feeling my emotions burst, Like fireworks on 4th of July.  I can be loyal. I can take in your words. I can let the pain go. I can forget the things I don't want to remember. Breaking my heart. Sucking me dry. Feeling the numbness surround my body. As you walked, before I got to. Like I said, I can be loyal to you. Be faithful, make you smile.

Do you remember?  What you said on that starry night? Do you remember? My breath against your skin? I remember you, everyday. Like fresh brewed coffee on a Sunday Morning. Like freshly cut flowers on the window sill. Remembering those laced promises. They became static noise on a radio. Broken promises embedded in my fingernails. Remembering the touch of your skin. My heart beating like drummers. Do you remember? How you told me babe? Do you remember? That you weren't going to be like the others? I remember, wanting you. Feeling like time stopped because I had you. Like nothing else mattered. Remembering those webs of moments. Do you remember? My touch against your lips? Do you remember? The way I held you? I remember, loving you. Like you were my ray of sunshine. Like my way of breathing.  Remembering your person through all your mistakes. Texting me in the morning before I woke up. Always finding new ways to tell me, That I was beautiful. Mak